Headteacher shares the one thing you should remember on parents' evening

The autumn term parents' evenings are upon us and, frankly, they can sometimes feel a bit overwhelming. Whether online or in person, you rarely get more than five minutes with each of your child's teachers at secondary school.

For this reason, we asked Jason Bridges, Principal of Cockshut Hill School in Yardley for his advice on how to make every one of those precious minutes count. He said that preparation is vital and that it's better to plan ahead rather than just turning up and waiting to see what they have to say.

His key messages are for you to talk to your child beforehand, read their report, write down a couple of questions for each teacher and talk through what was said with your child afterwards. And his one crucial piece of advice? Don't worry about pleasantries!

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How can you make the most of the five minutes you get with your child's teacher?

Jason said: "Parent and carer meetings are short, therefore make sure you are well prepared in advance. Talk to your child beforehand about how they find school and learning in various subjects, what they enjoy and what they find difficult. Look back at previous reports, homework and marks for tests, to build a picture of their strengths and areas for improvement.

"Jot down two to three key questions you want to ask to ensure you utilise the time really well. A key piece of advice: do not worry too much about the pleasantries – no one will think you are rude if you keep the “hello” and “how are you” to a minimum!"

Listen to our award-winning Brummie Mummies podcast here all about how to get the most out of parents' evening- and be sure to subscribe to Brummie Mummies where you'll find lots of episodes on how to help your child at school.

Is it okay to take notes as the teacher talks?

"You will potentially be meeting a lot of different subject teachers in a short space of time on parents and carers’ evening, therefore it can be a good idea to take notes of specific comments each teacher provides. That way, you can give a really accurate and detailed summary to your child, so they have definite feedback to focus on."

What should you do if you have concerns - do you raise them during this meeting or ask to see the teacher at another time?

"If you have a more complex or longstanding issue to discuss, it is worth considering whether parents and carers’ evening is the right occasion, particularly given time is tight and the environment quite public. It may be more appropriate to arrange a separate meeting, or to address your concerns to your child’s Head of Year, or a Senior Leader, in some circumstances, where you can have a fuller discussion and not feel rushed.

"Some schools have an email system for any follow ups that are required after the parents and carers' evenings."

What about if a child is trying their best but underachieving academically? What can be done to help?

"It is always tough to see a child struggle, particularly when they are working really hard. However, their teacher will be able to talk you through their personal learning journey, what their next target is, and give practical suggestions for how you can help them achieve it.

"At Cockshut Hill School, our achievement team can support parents and carers with many different bespoke resources to ensure that your child succeeds, from online learning platforms to homework clubs and additional learning resources to meet many additional learning needs. If you, or they, think it is due to some underlying learning need, you can also discuss whether a separate appointment – with the SENDCO (Special Educational Needs Co-ordinator) – may be useful."

Is it a good idea to take your child's report to parents' evening?

"I strongly recommend that you have read your child’s report prior to the parent and carer evening to enable you to focus on specific feedback and discuss what progress your child has made over time. You can take the report along if you would find it helpful, but your child’s teacher will also have a copy and be aware of the comments they have added."

Should you take your child or go on your own?

Jason said: "Schools have different policies as to whether your child should accompany you to parent and carers’’ evening – at Cockshut Hill School we encourage you to bring your child along as it helps them to take responsibility for their own learning and to strengthen the relationship between the school, the parent or carer and the learner.

"It is worth checking with the school if you are not sure. Regardless of whether your son or daughter attends on the night, it is important they take responsibility for their learning and therefore make sure you give them a detailed and accurate summary of the comments when you get home."

What about if a parent thinks their child has special needs, can they speak to the SEND team on parents’ evening?

"Some schools have a wide selection of additional staff present at parents and carers’ evenings but, given the open nature of the event, you may find it helpful to make a separate appointment to discuss your child’s personal situation. And remember, you don’t have to wait for parents’ and carers’ evening to seek advice – your school will be pleased to discuss any particular learning needs at any time."

What should a parent or carer do if they come away feeling confused? What if the information they have been given conflicts with how their child is at home?

"As teachers, it is important we understand each child holistically and if there is a great discrepancy in how they behave at school, to how they are at home, we want to know and to try and understand why. If you feel confused about any comments, do ask for clarification, and tell us what your experience is of your child – we want to listen and work with you to support them as best we can.

"Schools much prefer to be proactive rather than reactive, and welcome contact by parents and carers."

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